Resolutions

Looking back over the last year, my blogging efforts have been dismal.  In a perfect world, this would not be the case.  I can honestly say that procrastination has been a close friend over the course of this past year.  I’ve put off grading, recording lectures, and cleaning out junk in my house. Heck, I’ve even procrastinated in my reading—and I love to read! 

Truthfully, there are many reasons people procrastinate.  Some of these reasons are legitimate; we simply can’t control some things.  Even these situations that are out of our control give us a sense of guilt.  Why can’t we control all the circumstances in our life?  That would happen in a perfect world.  Some reasons for procrastination are not legitimate.  We simply don’t do what needs to be done.  We’re busy (that again!); we’re distracted; we’re tired; we’re simply not interested. 

Every year I resolve to do better, and this year is no exception.  So, this year:

I resolve to be more faithful in my devotional time.  This is one area in which I’m already relatively faithful.  Typically, I get up around 5:00 a.m. most days (translated to mean week days, more specifically week days during the semester).  I pour a cup of coffee, my Bible, and my devotional Streams in the Desert.  The next half hour is spent in prayer and reading scripture and my devotional. This sounds great, but many mornings I find myself rushing through my scripture reading.  The result is that I have no real recollection of the scripture I’ve just read. This year, I resolve to savor scripture, even if I read fewer verses and chapters.  I want God’s word to sink deep into the chambers of my heart.  I also resolve not to allow my devotional time to fall apart between semesters and during the summer.  The lure of sleeping later on holidays is difficult to overcome.  It’s not really the sleeping later that’s a problem; it’s that voice that says “It’s already 8:00 a.m.; there’s no real time for prayer and scripture.”  That is not the voice of God, and I resolve to ignore that voice this year.

I resolve to be more faithful in my church attendance.  The truth of the matter is that the past couple of years have been fraught with health issues.  It seemed as though someone was always ill, resulting in a missed church service.  I’ve also allowed the fact that I’ve procrastinated in grading to be the cause of missing church.  When grading piles up, I have to catch-up; that catch-up time usually occurs on Sunday. 

I resolve to be more consistent in keeping current with my work.   This will be my most difficult challenge.  I always intend to stay current with my grading, but it just never seems to happen.  I always end up with a mountain of assignments to grade.  Falling behind in grading is compounded by the fact that I’m also a slow grader.  I simply can’t bring myself to simply slap a grade on a paper; I feel that I must read every word and make comments on each paper.  While I may not gain any speed in grading, I resolve to be more consistent in the time I spend grading.  Perhaps if I spend at least a few minutes every day, I can keep the mountain from getting completely out of control.

I resolve to be more consistent with my reading. Frankly, I’m appalled that this should be considered as a resolution because I love to read.  For far too long, though, I’ve pushed my love of reading aside.  There was always a myriad of reasons to forego my love:  I was working on my doctorate, I had things to grade, I needed to read “academic” things.  I always regarded reading something I loved as a guilty pleasure; I felt I should be doing something more important—like grading. 

I resolve cook more.  I love to cook, but, once again, I pushed this aside because I was “busy” with other things.  However, ignoring this resolution can have deadly consequences.  I firmly believe our health is connected to the things we eat, so cooking healthy meals really isn’t an option.  This year, my goal is try new recipes that help bring health to my family.

I resolve to exercise more consistently.  I always have good intentions when it comes to exercising.  My husband even bought me a very nice treadmill.  Unfortunately, procrastination once again rears its ugly head and tells me that I don’t have time to get on the treadmill.  This year, I plan to begin a consistent walking regime. 

I resolve to do the things I love more consistently.  In a perfect world, this would be a simple task.  I would have plenty of time to stay current with my teaching and grading responsibilities and still have time to read, play the piano, and dabble in watercolors.  While this is not really realistic, my goal is to at least carve some time for these hobbies.  Life is simply too short not to do the things we love.

Will I be able to keep all these resolutions?  Probably not.  In a perfect world, I would keep all the resolutions I’ve made in the coming year.  However, in the imperfect world in which we live, the real tragedy is not failing to keep the resolutions, but in not making them and accepting the apathy.  I resolve to more closer to a perfect world.

Loving as Christ Loves

In a perfect world, all Christians would love others and extend forgiveness in the same spirit Christ loved and forgave those He encountered.  Unfortunately, that is often not the case with Christians.  It is a sad fact that far too many Christians look for opportunities to tear other Christians down in order to promote the façade of being “holy.”  I’m sure almost everyone has a story of a fellow Christian who was maligned or perhaps even fired from a job because another Christian felt it was their “Christian duty” to point out a perceived shortcoming to a supervisor.  How unfortunate that we as Christians don’t stop to ask ourselves how Christ might have approached the same situation.  Would Jesus have reported a perceived “sin” to a superior, or would He have gently but firmly tried to help that one who had allegedly strayed off the path to realize the folly of the action?  Certainly, illegal activity shouldn’t be ignored, but often the “report” concerns a perceived personal failure. 

I recently read Ted Dekker’s novel Outlaw, which deals with the concept of unconditional love and forgiveness.  Admittedly, it was a difficult novel to read in the sense that it calls Christians on the carpet about the way we tend to treat and judge others.  In the novel, Julian is a young, widowed mother of a young son, Stephen, who is the pride and joy of her life.  In fact, Julian’s life revolved around Stephen.  Following a “dream,” which she interprets to be a call of God, Julian takes Stephen and embarks on a journey to Indonesia.  An unexpected storm leaves her a captive in a barbaric (to the Western paradigm) culture and believing her young son is dead.  The first half of the novel will be offensive to some Christians because of the stark portrayal of the lifestyle and dress of a tribal people; many Christians, no doubt, will condemn some of Julian’s actions.  At times, Julian questions whether she even believes in a God who has seemingly abandoned her.  That’s one of the first issues Dekker addresses in this novel—Christians who quickly “jump ship” when their life isn’t easy and comfortable.  But God had a plan for Julian (and her son); a plan that isn’t revealed until the end of the novel. 

Ultimately, it’s the end of the novel that will prove to be the real stumbling block for many Christians. The novel illustrates the power of unconditional love and forgiveness; it shows how God’s nature and power can manifest itself in a life that is completely surrendered to Him and willing to do whatever God asks.  This last half of the novel truly touched my heart and made me ask myself how often I have been unwilling to extend forgiveness and unconditional love to those who have wronged or offended me.  It’s very easy to hold a grudge and act in ways we feel will avenge the wrong, but in most cases, that type of action doesn’t resolve anything—it only leads to more anger, bitterness, and resentment.  I’m always amazed at the vitriol that seems to come so easily to many Christians; it’s so easy to cloak ourselves in self-righteousness and point condemning fingers at other Christians who may have strayed.  What would happen if we could bring ourselves to completely forgive those who have wronged us?  True, it might not affect the other person, but the effect on us would be immeasurable.  Why do so many Christians attack other believers?  What if we simply loved them back to God’s truth?  One of the best examples of this is the way in which Christians treat homosexuals.  Christians are quick to condemn, but very slow to love.  “Christians” call for boycotts  of businesses owned and operated by homosexuals and say some very vitriolic things.  What if, instead of condemning them, we show them the love of Christ; it is, after all, His place to convict, not ours.  Christ didn’t boycott sinners; He sought them out; He dined with them; He showed them the love of the Father.  I read a one review of Outlaw that claimed love and forgiveness doesn’t  always conquer all.  Perhaps not, but our judgmental approach isn’t really working all that well either.  One point that the novel never strays from is that God’s truth must never be compromised.  Julian and her son never compromise their faith even though Julian lives in a state of spiritual defeat throughout much of the novel, but this is precisely the state in which many modern day Christians dwell. 

In a perfect world, Christians would love and forgive unconditionally.  Luke 6:35 says, “But love your enemies, do good to them, and lend to them without expecting to get anything back.  Then your reward will be great, and you will be sons of the Most High, because he is kind to the ungrateful and wicked.”  This doesn’t mean that Christians must accept every philosophy or lifestyle that comes along, but it does mean that we need to love those who engage in those philosophies or lifestyles back to Christ.  Condemnation, which is easy, doesn’t persuade anyone to change, but unconditional love “does no harm to its neighbor” (Romans 13:10).